China

Okay, so my dear friend Carrie and I had the most hysterical conversation on the phone today. I laughed so much my cheeks hurt. Carrie wants to go to China. And I want to go with her. She has a friend living there for a few years and we both want to go stay with her for a while before she comes home.
Now, I know what many of you are saying "Yeah right, Alice, on an airplane for 12 hours...yeah." And that's furrrshur. I would rather crawl on my bare knees through all the public bathrooms in the greater South Bend area than spend 10 seconds on an airplane. Though the very thought of either makes me want to vomit.
But, I really want to go to China. I really do. So we decided that after Christmas I would test my nerves with my precious supply of Xanax. On a Tuesday, so Merkle is home, I'm going to take 2 pills and have Merkle time me to see how long it takes before I'm so relaxed I start to drool. Then he's going to watch the clock for signs of me coming out of it. That way Carrie will know exactly when to alert the cardiologist (that we will arrange to be sitting next to me) that I need my next dose.
Okay, so good plans, yes? So I get home today from taking Lucky to the kennel and I say to Mark that I am going to go to China. Immediatly Emily goes up to her room and starts crying!!! And Grace is hanging on me saying "No, Mommy, no please don't go to China. Please Mommy don't go." And Mark is upset with me telling me "You're not going to China."

WHAT??

What's happened?

Come on people, I'm mostly talk. Don't you know this by now? And if I really do plan on going to China am I going in the next 5 minutes? No. Probably not. Please, though, let me have my dream...